Having Zal and Natasha stay with me for the last three weeks has been a truly memorable experience. We did a lot of fun things and shared some very important moments. However, I can’t deny that it was difficult. After all, I’m not used to playing full-time parent to two growing children. It’s time intensive and emotionally demanding. Though I’ve learned many things during this time, one of the most valuable lessons is the importance of delegation.
It’s a lesson that single moms already know. The day to day demands of raising children without anyone else to fall back on are exhausting. I did it for three weeks; -single moms make a lifestyle of it.
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These moms learn how to focus their energy on the right things. They put their efforts into the things that need to be done both in their business lives and their personal experiences. They prioritize in order to make sure that their jobs get done while also saving enough time for their children.
I have a new found respect for Single Parent.
Over the last three weeks, I had a crash course in delegation. Since I had limited time with Zal and Natasha, I wanted to make sure that I gave them as much attention as I could. To do that, I had to reevaluate my business habits. I had to look carefully at my business tasks and only do the ones that were specifically catered to my skill set.
I did these necessary tasks myself and then turned the remainder of the business over to others.
I’ve always thought that I was good at delegating, but I never realized just how important it was until I put it into practice on this level. By prioritizing my attention on Zal and Natasha, I was forced to limit my work life. As a result, I was pleasantly surprised to find not only that others could get these tasks done, but that my personal life and my business life were better off for this new found balance.
It’s a valuable lesson for everyone–single moms, family men, and business people. We need to focus on our skill sets, do the tasks geared to us, and then delegate the rest. This allows you to play to your strengths, and by focusing your energy, you can be sure that your best work is being done.
It may cost a little more to delegate things out, but by focusing on your strengths the ROI will be well worth the price.
I would love to hear back from from parents how and what they do to create that balance in their lives.
Keep Sharing!
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i had the best time here and because i had a good time time because my uncle was here and we did a lot with him and i might say he is vary vary playful and he has strong muscles so he can carry me.
just so you know i think he is the best uncle in the world:)
Zal buddy, you are the best nephew anyone uncle can ever dream of having. You give me so much love.
Love you.
What an amazing growth opportunity for you Fred. As you stated being a single parent isn’t easy. Whether you are a single Mom or Dad with the responsibility to care and feed the children it is a challenge beyond anything you ever imagined. It is a lifetime commitment. Single parents should remember they aren’t alone. It is true that community raises a child and if you have the courage to tap into that resource your children will benefit for the rest of their lives. Raising two daughters on my own helped me understand the importance of commitment, accountability, and that magical thing called “delegation”…Jo “the queen of delegation”.
Jo, you are an amazing woman.
If there is anyone that can delegate effectively you are the one.
Fred, great to hear you’re enjoying the kids so much
I find it fascinating that people give single parents this superhero status when really we’re not doing anything spectacular, it’s just life
All parents put their kid’s happiness and well being first, the difference is that as part of a parenting team you have the luxury of making some selfish decisions because you have the support of your partner to depend on and provide the balance to the family – as single parents we lose that luxury just a little.
Delegation, priorities, perspective, flexibility and adaptability…they’re all important parenting skills for sure. It would be easy if all we had to worry about was our kid’s happiness but along with our responsibilities to them, we also make commitments to our work, friends, family and ourselves. As a single parent I can’t forgo one but intead give each one their own time. I know for myself, delegation is probably the hardest one as it means not being a part of something. I think all parents struggle with the “I have to’s” versus “I want to’s” and are left with a little guilt along the way. Knowing that no parent is perfect and wanting to be so are a constant struggle of the heart. At the end of the day though, the kids grow up knowing they were loved, respected and cared for and exhibit those same values in their life than I’ll be very happy with my choices.
Deanne, first and foremost, single parents in my books are super heros and they are doing something spectacular.
Fred, awesome post, man! We all need to make more time for friends and family and realize work is not a be-all-end-all.
Ryan, work work work, we do need to do it. So if we are doing it anyways we might as well be as effective as we can be so we can enjoy the fruits of our labour.
dear Fred,that was nice to read ! re. Parenting Skills & the workings of…I found that the “I” gets replaced by a “We” and then then things start to wotk out nuch better. Kids, Teensgars even are always looking for guidance…though it may not always look like it !
Kind Regards from London,
Milt.
Milton, you have hit the nail on the head. Kids are truly looking and craving for guidance from us. When we do not take time to give them the guidance through our actions they will take it from the outside world.
Hi Fred, thanks for the article. Lots of interesting replies already, and being a single parent I certainly appreciate your insight. Being a parent, whether together with a partner or alone, has its challenges. Having been a child of two working parents, a lot of responsibility was delegated in that situation too, something I was thankful for once I moved out as a young adult.
One of the things you asked is what we do as single parents to delegate. This fall, a new responsibility I am delegating to my 12 year old is having her do her own laundry. She is the biggest culprit in my house for stains on her clothes, and it takes the longest for me to do her stain removal! As hard as it will be for me to delegate this to her, I know in the long run it will help her develop independent skills. Hopefully I will be able to stick with it and not cave to wanting to do it myself!
Shandra, that is awesome. Make them responsible for their actions and they will be more aware about their actions.
You are the best Uncle any kid could have…I agree with Zal!
Great post, Fred …